1 ⚾ Sign says 70 mph. Your radar gun says 52. Balls are so dimpled they curve on their own. Bring your own if you want actual practice. 2 🤔 Machines work if you hit them twice and sacrifice a small animal. Speed is a suggestion. Your kid got swings. That's the only positive thing you can say. 3 ⚙️ Machines work. Speed is close enough. Balls are old but they fly. Your kid didn't complain. You didn't complain. That's a win in 2026. 4 😍 Accurate speed. Well-maintained. Your kid asked for one more round. You said yes. You're coming back next week. They don't know it yet. 5 🏆 Multiple speeds. Curveballs. Everything works. Guy fixed a jam in 30 seconds. This is your cage now. Tell absolutely no one.
1 😭 No instructors anywhere. Your coaching strategy is YouTube videos from 2014 and yelling "keep your hands back." It's not working. It's never worked. 2 🤷 Guy's been on his phone for 12 of your 30-minute lesson. You paid $75. He just said "looks good" for the fifth time. Your kid's swing didn't change. Your bank account did. 3 👍 Instructor showed up. Watched your kid. Said three useful things. You're booking again because the bar is in hell and he cleared it. 4 😊 Actually fixed something. Your kid's hitting better. You paid $80. You're not mad about it. First time all season you're not mad about something. 5 🏆 Fixed your kid's load in 10 minutes. You've been yelling "stay back" from dugouts for two seasons. Instructor said "feel this." Kid got it instantly. You're jealous of a batting instructor.
1 💸 $6 for 15 pitches. You did math in the parking lot. $40 for 100 swings. Your kid wants a second round. Your wallet physically recoiled. You said no. They're still bringing it up. 2 💰 Not cheap. Not outright theft. You'll pack snacks from home to balance the budget. This is your life now. Your kid asked why you brought a cooler. You explained economics. 3 💵 Fair pricing. Didn't feel robbed walking out. Your kid got swings. You got change. For batting cages in 2026, that's a standing ovation. 4 🤑 Family packages exist. Multi-kid discounts are real. Someone here has three kids and remembers what $6 per token feels like. You're coming back weekly. 5 🏆 Memberships actually save money. Your kid got better. You didn't overdraft. You cancelled nothing to afford this. Mythical combination. Frame the receipt.
1 🏚️ Lobby smells like 1997. Chairs are a suggestion. Ceiling tiles are stained. You sat on the floor. Your kid asked why. You had no good answer. 2 😬 Functional like a '99 Civic is functional. Nets have holes but mostly work. You lowered expectations before walking in. Still disappointed. 3 🏢 Clean enough. Floors swept most days. Nobody left angry. This is the median batting cage in America. You've accepted this. 4 ✨ Well-maintained. Good lighting. Your kid walked in and stood taller. You noticed. You'll be back. 5 🏆 Your kid asked to come back before you got to the car. Unprompted. You're texting three families right now. This is the one.
Select Categories Above Google gives you stars. We give you what actually matters.
_1718046390674.jpg)